Food and Family

On the 31st, after returning to Christchurch, Michele and I went to the Buddhist Centre for lunch. This would be my fourth time there. I ordered the laksa, which is a Singporean dish.


Michele then got hold of the camera. Spicy food, yes, is good. My nose is long enough to reach the soup. The law of foreshortening did not work to my advantage here.


That evening the sky turned pink and orange and we biked to Misceo's for dinner. We toasted over Monteith's award-winning amber and Old Dark. The following morning I flew to Melbourne, Australia.

I have a few reflections to make about New Zealand. Remind me if I forget. Of course, it would be possible to make the reflections in December, upon returning there. Meantime, I'm realizing it's not so easy to have this journal keep up with my thoughts on things. For the most part, I've been enjoying myself, although I've alternately been overwhelmed and a bit too clearly gaining perspective on my life back home. A couple of "no longers" have surfaced in my invisible commitment list. And, many of my "no longers," or Nevers, have surpassed Maybe and entered the realm of Definitely. In other words, I'm shifting my personal vows, committing to a healthier work schedule, to a life of adventure, and--on the other side of the spectrum--relaxing my views on marriage, which I used to think was stupid.

It also seems to me that Israelis (and Jews in general) are an adaptable, adventurous group. If it were up to me, I'd allocate the money used for nuclear warheads and military research for Israeli resettlement. I don't want to weigh in on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict at all -- just to say that Israelis like money and moving around, so why not give Israelis gobs of money to go travel or buy houses in France, the U.S., Australia, and the like? Israel is a huge desert anyway. The Bible, if I remember correctly, called it a "highway." Who wants to live on a dark, desert highway? Imagine if the U.S. government said to the Israelis, "We're not passing judgment, don't think anyone should win this land, but we know you're adaptable, so here's gobs of money. We were going to spend it on warheads, but instead we're spending it on you. Go find a lush, beautiful place. Call it paradise."

OK, crazy theories aside, I'm now in Melbourne, Australia! Before a couple weeks ago, I thought I had only one cousin here, but from thinking there was a Helen here, there grew a Nathan and a Linda, and then there grew a Ruth and a Henry, and some of them had kids and some of their kids had kids. So, the family grew exponentially from there. Many of the following photos are for my family, whom I probably just upset with my presumptious and wild ideas about creating peace in the Mideast, so feel free to read on or not. When I was in high school, I was the only kid in class who read all of our assigned Moby Dick readings, including the part about who was the son of whom. What I mean is, I won't blame anyone for skimming the part about who begat whomever -- or for skimming in general. By all means, look at pictures.

While Nathan was at work, one of the first things Linda and I did on Friday morning was run errands. First we dropped off the kids at their school, and then we stopped by three different food places. This is why I love my family, and this is why I love Melbourne. My family loves food. This town is positively dripping with food. It doesn't matter that Linda has a fully stocked pantry; we had to buy bread and cookies and a variety of prepared salads. Even then we weren't going to sit and eat our purchases. We took our grocery bags to Louie's, owned by a South African Jew, and bought breakfast. Louie's, as the guy who sat next to me on the plane said, is the best deli in Melbourne (and probably anywhere). I've never seen a lunch place like this. The tables had to be shoved in the back to make room for the display cases of stacked quiches, lasagnas, breads, meats. Foccacia breads were hanging on racks. Stored foods, as in olive oils, jams, olives, biscuits, and coffees, were lined on shelves. Paninis, sandwiches, cakes, cheeses, all fresh and beautiful and good -- the room was slathered in food.

That night I met more family members and together we had a Friday night ritual supper, where I met George, who would've been contemporary of my grandmother, and his descendants. I was still on New Zealand time and tired by 8, but I drank wine and answered all sorts of questions, though my relationship to everyone is probably considered distant by most. We're all second and third cousins. But, for us, descendants of holocaust survivors and others who were lucky, we all have to stick together. I did feel as if they were family, beyond just the label that they are. Many of them looked like me or like others of my close relatives. Beyond that, they had certain expressions and interests and ways of communicating that just reminded me of home. That type of familiarity is strange and instinctual. I'm not saying I had more than polite conversation with everyone; I didn't. As with all social gatherings, I only immediately connected with a small fraction. But, even were there one connection, it would be enough.

On Saturday Nathan and Linda took me to the Healesville Sanctuary, where we could see native Australian animals (wallabies, koalas, bilbies, platypuses). As you all know, I love animals and love places like this, nothing like zoos. Here the animals are well taken care of and given proper habitats. There is even a wildlife hospital, which is also an educational center, on sight.

Here is a koala who was supposed to be mating with any of three other female koalas. According to the Keeper (that's what they call the caretaker), though, he hasn't been interested. Koalas sleep about 20 hours a day and eat and groom for the rest, so there may not have been time for him to be seduced.


This koala was extraordinarily placid. His mom had been hit by a car, and someone had turned in this koala when he was a baby. The Keeper mentioned that most koalas don't let you hold them in this way.


Here is Eva, Nathan's daughter, in front of a kangaroo.


This morning the whole family met for brunch at Brighton Beach. (Yes, this one is called Brighton, too.) It's probably a good time to mention how we're all related. My dad's mother, whose name was Miriam, had a first cousin named Eva. Eva had two siblings, Leon and Etka. They were, of course, also first cousins to Miriam. Eva first moved to Paris and then to Melbourne to be with the rest of her siblings. Nathan was the child of Eva and George. Nathan married Linda, who is from Mozambique and Portugal. They're my hosts and have two kids, Phillip and Eva.

Etka had two daughters, Helen and Ruth. Leon had several kids, whom I haven't met, but one is named Henry. Ruth married Gary. They have three sons (David, Michael, and Ben) and one daughter, Sarah, whom I haven't met. Henry has three sons (Jeremy, Steve, and Antony) and one daughter, Cara. Cara, who looks like my first cousin (also named Miriam), married an Israeli named Zac. Together they have a daughter named Mika. Steve married a woman named Lisa; they have a son named Luka. Jeremy brought his girlfriend Casey. Antony brought his girlfriend Amanda. Zac brought his sister Shani.

We had to spread out to two tables. Here they are, beginning from the lower left-hand corner and going clockwise: Steve, Ben, Phillip, Eva's arm, Linda, Gary, Ruthie, Jeremy, Me, Casey, Amanda, Antony, Lisa, and the back of Luka.


From another angle, here they are beginning with the smiling guy on the left and going clockwise: Ben, Phillip, Eva, Linda, Gary, Ruthie, Jeremy, my eyes, the top of Casey's head, Amanda, Antony, the back of Luka, and Lisa.


At the other table, here is another group, beginning in the lower left-hand corner and going clockwise: David, Zac, Nathan, go across to the white pillar to leave off the three people in the back, Shani, Mika, Cara, and me.


In this picture you see Mika, Zac, and Nathan.


Here are Lisa and Luka, a bit too backlit but cute.


Here are the sisters, Ruth and Helen, daughters of Etka. Helen is about to turn 50 and Ruth is in her 50s. Wow is all I can say to that. Beyond witnessing how young-looking these gals are, I was glad to hear that the three siblings (Leon, Etka, and Eva) who were my grandmother Miriam's cousins all lived to a fairly old age.


Here Phillip (Nathan's son) plays with Ben (Ruthie's son).



Nathan, Linda, Phillip, Eva, Ruth, and Gary then took me on a drive along the beach (Brighton and Sandy). Australia is experiencing a terrible drought, and it hadn't rained hard since May, but today it poured. Whereas most people would consider today to be horrible weather, everyone was delighted about the rain. We saw the Cerberus, a purposefully sunk iron warship, which was used around the turn of the 19th century and then sunk to break the tide. We saw the Melbourne skyline, too. Here is Phillip who, as he passed me, said "Missed." I don't think I missed. What a cute boy he is!


Here are Linda and her daughter Eva.


These are the famous bathing boxes along the shore. People paint them so as to personalize them, and they cost an exorbitant amount to have. They sit low on the cabana scale -- don't you think so? But, they're cool-looking!


Tomorrow we plan to go to Rickett's Point or something like that, and I have to figure out where to go after Melbourne. Eva, the three-year-old girl, asked me if I would live with them forever. I told her that she'd have to find me a job first. She nodded her head in earnest, said OK, and walked away as if to go find me one.